I’ve just got in after almost a fortnight away and decided to check the garage before heading off to bed.

The Gixxer has gone: stolen. The remnants of the padlock which had been bolt-cropped are still there but the thieving bastards even took the Abus chain with them. The Met. Police have been telephoned and should be in touch within the 24-48 hours to process it. I mentioned the lock and that they might be able to do something with the bits but the operator was non-committal… I doubt they’ll even bother interviewing the neighbours, even though one is almost always there. It has been alpha-dotted and marked with SmartWater, so who knows? Maybe I’ll get lucky and get it back.

So if you’re offered a low-mileage, immaculate 2004 Suzuki GSX-R750K4 engine number R741-100646 VIN/frame number JS1B3111200100375 it’s mine!